The Over Blogger filled me in on as many details about the King Fear as she could. Unfortunately, it wasn’t much. What we know is that the King Fear is the most powerful of all Fears, with all of their abilities combined together. He leads the Fears in secret, and is the cause of all misery and suffering within the Mythos. The Over Blogger has never seen him, making his true form a mystery.
Staying in one place for too long left us exposed, and as a result it wasn’t long before another Fear appeared to attack us! His face was blank save for an abnormally large and toothy smile, and he wore a bright multicolored suit over his long and spindly limbs.
“Behold, Omega! It is I, the…”
“It’s the Smiling Man!” I screamed at the foe.
The Fear seemed taken aback by this. “What? No! I’m not the Smiling Man!”
“He’s right.” Over Blogger said. “The Smiling Man is usually portrayed with more humanlike proportions and facial appearances. This is clearly something different.”
“Yes! As I was saying, I am…”
“It’s the Splendor Man!” I screamed again.
This proclamation was met with silence. “You… you mean from that parody video by Neil Cicierega?” Spacefuture Blogger said.
“Oh, he may have originated from a parody video.” I darkly replied. “But soon after, bloggers took it upon themselves to create genuine horror blogs featuring him!”
“Hm… no, that still doesn’t make sense.” Over Blogger thoughtfully said. “The Splendor Man wears a dark suit, not a multicolored one. Also he has eyes.”
“Thank you!” The Fear angrily said. “I’m not the Smiling Man or the Splendor Man! I am the….”
“It’s the mutant lovechild of the Smiling Man and Splendor Man!” I screamed once more.
“…. WHAT?!” The Fear screamed back. “How does that… that doesn’t make any…. I’m the Merryman! The fucking Merryman! Fear of the Irrational! You think just because I’m smiling I’m some kind of Smiling/Splendor ripoff? Lots of horror monsters smile! What, do you think the Red Cap and EAT are the same just because they’re both liquid?”
“You cannot trick me with your tricky whiles, SplendorSmiles Man!”
“…You know what? No. I’m done.” The Fear threw his hands up in the air in frustration. “I had something really cool planned. There were gonna be hallucinations, I was going to make you question what was real and what wasn’t, it was going to be really neat and everyone was going to have a good time. But you’ve ruined it. I’m done with this. I don’t even want to be a part of this stupid universe anyways. I’m going to see where the Vision went and hang out with her.”
As the Fear walked away, I nodded with satisfaction. “Another victory won for the forces of Good!”
Over Blogger seemed confused for some reason. “Did… did you actually plan that? Was that whole thing an act to beat him?”
“Silly Over Blogger, of course I planned it all!”
“Wow. That’s actually more impressive than what I would have thought from you.”
“The moment I saw the SplendorSmiles Man, I knew he was too cowardly to face me in direct combat! I just had to stand my ground, and he would run away like a coward! Even if they try to combine themselves, these Fears are no match for me!”
“Okay you know what I take what I said back. Let’s just… go and find the King Fear.”
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